Lyrics: Thrive in hell (demo recording in progress)

They painted gold on the ceiling
Called it heaven, sold it well
Taught me how to smile while kneeling
Told me this is how you build yourself

Every promise dressed in velvet
Every warning dressed as care
“If you give us all your daylight
You’ll be breathing better air”

But the air was getting thinner
And the lights were burning cold
I was trading pieces of me
For a story I was told

You said the monsters weren’t real
Just shadows in my head
So I learned to shake their hands
And sleep beside my dread

I don’t thrive — I endure
I wear the crown of something pure
But it’s made of borrowed light
And sleepless nights

I don’t shine — I survive
Three long years just staying alive
If this is heaven, let me burn
I learned to live in hell

They built a garden out of ashes
Called it growth and called it grace
Said the bruises on my spirit
Were just passion on my face

Every ladder made of silence
Every step a quiet scream
“Give a little more of yourself” 
Till there’s nothing left to bleed

You said I’d rise if I surrendered
Said the pain would make me whole
But I was only getting better
At surviving without a soul

I don’t thrive — I endure
I built my lungs to breathe the war
And I smile like I’ve been blessed
But I’m unrest

I don’t shine — I survive
Made it look like I’m alive
If this is heaven you designed
I’ll take the fire instead

I think I had enough
Of shrinking to fit your dream
You called it loyalty
I call it losing me

I don’t thrive — I endure
I built my lungs to breathe the war
And I smile like I’ve been blessed
But I’m unrest

I don’t shine — I survive
Made it look like I’m alive
If this is heaven you designed
I’ll take the fire instead
 
I don’t thrive — I endure
But I remember who I was before
And I’d rather break the spell
Than rule this fucking hell

Three long years, I played it well
Made survival look like wealth
If this is what you call a crown
I lay it down

I don’t thrive — I endure
But I remember who I was before
And I’d rather break the spell
Than rule in hell